This is part of a series. You can view all the posts together.
Last night I was writing an email and trying to articulate something I’ve been struggling with lately:
I really want to get to the point where it’s not just that I know that God is in control of whether I live or die, and to know that whichever happens is good, but to get to the point where “to live is Christ, and to die is gain”… where the only reason I want to stay here is to do the work God sets out for me, but apart from that every other atom in me is just dying to go home. […] I need to be more world-weary and heaven-happy, so that instead of just refusing to allow myself to worry I actually have no inclination to.
And then, as I was trying to go to sleep, it occurred to me that I’ve never really studied heaven very much, and perhaps the reason I’m not overly keen to go there is because I don’t really know what it is. Or I know, but it’s not internalized and familiar to me.
So… lots of bloggers, as part of New Year’s resolutions, are doing such-and-such in their blog every day for a certain amount of time. And I want to do sort of the same thing, except with the goal of cultivating heavenwardness in my heart. Other circumstances not extenuating, over the next ten days, I’m going to write a post a day focusing on one reason why heaven is gonna be great. They’re not going to be the Ten Most Important, or really anything very much–just simple reasons that touch my heart and make me want to go and meet my Savior face-to-face.
(As an aside: while it might seem like the reason I’m obsessing over heaven is because of the whole cancer thing, the reality is that my lack of perspective on the subject has been bothering me for years. I could have written the paragraph above just as easily three years ago as last night.)
